Friday, May 05, 2006

Anastasia's Obsession

"The Icelandic Diary"

 Anastasia’s Obsession – The Icelandic Diary

Click here to play Video Diary

Dear Diary,
The Icelandic Language is a very very complicated language and I do not understand it at all.
It consists of a series of letters all thrown in together as if it is supposed to make some sort of sense. In fact if I were to speak in the Icelandic language it would sound, as if I have some sort of seizure and I am unable to breathe!! That is how hard it is to pronounce words in the Icelandic Language.

For instance – If I were to translate the English sentence
“I like to eat custard pies “
The Icelandic Translation would be:
Þá steig að sjá borgina og turninn

As you can see, it sounds as if I was having some sort of seizure and was unable to breathe.

But anyway, enough of all this.......
You see, not too long ago, I came across a diary of a strange man written in the Icelandic Language. In order to un-earth this man’s deep dark secrets, I have to painstakingly translate each Icelandic diary to the English Language. This has only been one HORRIBLE disaster.

In his latest Icelandic entry he writes -
Drottinn niður til þess um alla jörðina
Once again, it sounds like complete gibberish. And again it sounds like as if I was having some sort of seizure or some sort of trouble breathing as I read it.
Anyway, after spending all day translating this horrible diary entry I get an even stranger English Translation

He writes:
“I the Frog-Man awoke with despoliation desultory.”
Or maybe he wrote
“I the Frog-Man awoke with desultory despoliation”
It's hard to tell from the translation.
But it doesn't matter, because first of all what kind of man begins his diary entry with “I the Frog Man”!!!
And what on earth does "Desultory" and "Despoliation" mean.

This is so unfair. After spending hours and hours brooding over this man's horrible Icelandic Entry and painstakingly translating each word from his diary into English, I end up with an English sentence that consists of huge words of which I still cannot understand.
It looks like I need an English dictionary to translate what these big words mean!!!

This is so unfair and to top it off I still have not unearthed any dark secrets of this strange man, except lots of sentences with mumbo jumbo words.
Perhaps the only way to end my obsession with this man’s Icelandic diary is to get rid of the man himself. If there is no man, then there would be no Icelandic diary entry and thus my obsession with him will be gone as well......

Poison has always been a VERY VERY GOOD option.
With him gone, I shall once again be free of this strange man and his strange mumbo jumbo sentences in his Icelandic Diary. Not only that, but I believe that his pain and suffering shall be my pleasure.

Soon, I shall be free, because never again will I have to be bothered with the complexities of this horrible Icelandic language, for this man will be dead very very soon.


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