Anastasia Roams - They Long to Belong

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Dear Diary,
Today was just regular day in my life as I roamed the wilderness. The wilderness is not as frightening as it sounds. It’s a place of tranquility far away from human civilization.
While taking a stroll I heard a whimpering cry. It was a most familiar sound, but yet I couldn’t quite place my finger on it.
The sound got louder and louder, like an agonizing scream.
Ahhh--- that sound was from a human. It’s been so long since I’ve heard a human that I almost forgot what it sounds like. I peered behind the bushes and saw the human curled up in agony and writhing in pain.
Perhaps the human had fallen in a thorny bush. Thorns can be very painful. In Siberia, I was able to tolerate the thorns in my skin. But I am not the average human and I was convinced this human must be suffering because it was crying so loud.

“Hello human, what is the matter with you?” – I asked.

The human briefly looked up at me and then started to twist and turn in even more agony. I looked closer at the skin of this human. How odd? There were no wounds of the flesh. I concluded that no thorns had punctured the human. Then I noticed a branch of berries hanging above it.
Perhaps the human had eaten some sort of poisonous berry and was suffering from a tummy ache. I plucked a few berries and bit into it. Phhtttt… These were not the poisonous kind!!

The human then got up and and started to walk in circles. Then it dawned on me. This human was new here. It must have left the civilization and now that it is in the wilderness, it is unsure if it would still be persecuted.

“This is the wilderness darling. Nobody is going to persecute you. You are free to be who you are here” – I said.

Upon hearing my words, the human started to tremble with fear. Then it frantically pointed in the direction of the human civilization. I was stunned.

“You want to go back?” I asked.

The human eagerly nodded. How could I have assumed that a human can appreciate the freedom that exists in the great wilderness. After all it is only, I Anastasia that could enjoy the beauty here.

“Go straight and you will see the gates of the civilization.” I instructed it.

The human was motionless.

“Go! You long to belong don’t you? So go!” I screamed.

The human refused to thread thru the wilderness. It desperately needed someone to lead the way. Without a leader, it was confused. The human then started its cries of agony again. The cries were irritating and it wasn’t just me that was annoyed. The birds and other smaller animals were disturbed by this whining human.

I had no choice but to lead the way for I did not want this human’s cries to mar the peacefulness of this beautiful wilderness.

The human walked behind me like an obedient sheep. After walking a few hours, we finally approached the huge gates of the civilization.
This human must have accidentally wandered out of these gates. At this point the human was overjoyed at the sight of seeing its civilization.
Then it pushed me violently and ran desperately towards the gates.

“Yes, keep running you filthy human.“

Humans can be such selfish beings. An alarm went off. This human had alerted its leader that an intruder was near their gates. That intruder was I, Anastasia. Shots were being fired. I headed back to the wilderness. The humans did not follow me for they were too afraid of the wilderness and felt safe behind the gates.

I couldn’t recognize the human I had initially helped, for all the humans looked alike….like walking robots.
They stared at me behind the huge gates. The gates were mounted with shiny barbed wire and this surrounded the entire human civilization.

Why some choose to be imprisoned is something I can never understand. But just as I am questioning these humans they too must be baffled as to why I, Anastasia have chosen to live free.

Anastasia.


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Anastasia Grows - On My Way to Being GOD!

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Dear Diary,
I have deduced a most sensible mathematical equation from my observations. The equation is as follows :- A = B
Just because A precedes B does not mean the 2 letters are NOT equal. They are EXACTLY ALIKE.
Let me start from the beginning so you can understand my logic. I normally don’t mingle with humans but today was an exception. I was tired from roaming and decided to sit down in a cafeteria. The cafeteria was divided into 2 distant groups of humans. The first group was labeled Group A and they all sat to the left. The second group was called Group B and they were seated to the right.

Group A and Group B were enemies. Both felt they were uniquely different – that’s probably why they were on separate ends of the room. I went to rest on an empty chair that was at the side of Group A. I was not very interested in the conversation of the humans in Group A and found staring at my hands to be much more exciting.

I noticed that a good chunk of my skin was beginning to shed. You see, I never really was human… I would wear this human skin when exposing myself in public. I knew if I exposed who I really was, the outrage of the humans would be too much to bear, especially since at times, I get low on energy and am unable to defend myself.

But today I was feeling extra rebellious and was finding these humans to be quite the irritating pests that they always are.
So I happily peeled off a piece of this human skin and let it fall to the floor. Immediately the humans in Group A, started to scream in hatred –
“You are not one of use, go away!”

“Well where should I go?” – I asked

“Go over to Group B and sit with them” – They replied

Hmm… Human logic is full of blunders. Group A does not like Group B. Since I Anastasia was not liked by Group A, the humans assumed I belonged to Group B. What they fail to understand is that I Anastasia walk alone.
Anyway feeling in a mischievous mood, I went over and sat with Group B. This time I started to stare at my legs, for Group B’s conversation was just as boring as Group A.
Again the human skin was peeling off very easily from my leg. This time I completely removed it and held it up to the light…. Human skin is so frail, so weak…
At this point the humans in Group B were appalled.
“What are you?” - They screamed in disgust.

Vomir! Vomir! – screamed another human in Group B

Vomir? What could that mean? This human was speaking in French. It was saying that the sight of me makes her vomit!!
Hahahhaha… Why.. I Anastasia was hated internationally as well.
At this point both Group A and B gathered around me.

“Who are you ?”– They screamed.

“I am not like you.” – I answered.

“What do you want?” – They shouted in unison

“I do no want what you want.” – I answered

My answers puzzled them even more and their perplexity turned into anger. I had incited a war in a tiny cafeteria. As I looked down at these humans, I noticed that they were shrinking.
Suddenly my head hit the ceiling. Then it dawned on me. It wasn’t the humans that were shrinking but it was I Anastasia who was growing..

Group A and Group B were not mingling with each other. There HATRED of ME is what made them BOND!! How typical, they were never that different to begin with.

“What have you become” – They shouted as they stared at my huge presence.

“ Hahahahahahaha... I am on my way to being GOD!!” – I replied

The humans were repulsed at what I said but at the same time cringed with fear as my mere presence loomed over them.

“My existence is GREATER that all of your groups combined!”– I shouted

Being that I was on my way to being GOD, I felt strong bolds of lightening surge thru me. Ahhhhhh, my powers were in full effect. Like the Greek God Zeus I struck both Group A and Group B with lightening bolds.
Watching human squirm and run around frantically just before they die is a most glorious sight to see. Now I understand why Gods have so much fun..

As a GOD, I am not interested in having humans worship me. Humans are like roaches and no one cares what roaches worship.
But as a god, I have the gift of knowledge and that is a gift few have. Anyway my darling diary that was my ordeal today. And as far as that mathematical equation goes, I can safely conclude that GROUP A is equal to GROUP B

Anastasia


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Anastasia Buys a Painting - The Killer vs. The Artist

Anastasia Buys a Painting - The Killer vs. The Artist

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Dear Diary,
I just got back from a very interesting expedition. Let me start from the beginning. It is not often that I Anastasia go outdoors. But this was necessary.... You see my collection of knives were not doing so well.
Oh what is it that you are saying dear diary? Oh no darling, my knives are not sick, but they are getting blunt too easily, probably because of frequent use. And it is very frustrating to cut meat with a dull knife. Especially when the knife begins to break when trying to chop a backbone in 2 pieces.

Oh darling diary, I do not mean to beat you like that. But this has caused me an overwhelming amount of frustration. What I needed was a knife with a strong handle and a sharp long blade. It is at the flea market where one can hope to find such an unusual knife, so to the flea market I went.

I passed a stall filled with all sorts of quaint oddities. On top if it was a painting. It was a rough sketch of a rotting corpse against a bright orange background. There was something, very soothing and relaxing about this painting. The artist of this painting was sitting calmly on a chair and looked quite normal, but I sensed from his painting that something was amiss about him.

What has inspired you to paint this? I asked..
“Life” He replied. ”Life is the inspiration.“

Ha ha ha, this answer made me chuckle.
“Why, life inspires some to kill as well.” I said

The artist remained quiet. I could that this was an artist of few words, but his words were reflected in his painting. Thus the only way to converse with this artist was to read his painting. It is his creation that will reveal who he is.

As I stared at the painting, I began to realize that an artist and a killer are very much alike.The artist paints with passion, uses colors to express his emotions, draws images to portray his feelings and news.

Similarly, a killer kills with passion as well. Each stab into the flesh reflects her feelings. Each fresh kill reflects her emotions. Strong emotions are only found in unusual people. Strong emotions are a form of defiance. A defiance against living in a constricted human society.

In the end, the artist is happy and has a sense of accomplishment when he finishes his painting. He has left a deep mark in this world. Likewise, the killer is very happy at each human life, she takes. Arranging the dead body against a bright orange carpet is a display of her accomplishments. She has left a deep mark in this world as well.

In this case, this particular artist has created an image of a corpse while the killer has created an actual physical corpse. Similar creations by similar people. I now had to have this painting, for it had an uncanny way of calling out to me. I paid the artist the full price for this painting. I wondered if I should have haggled, for that seems to be the sort of thing that one does at a flea market. But I Anastasia do not haggle. I knew that if I wanted a lower price for it, all I had to do was take away the life of this artist and walk off with his painting. Now that’s a deal!!

But I knew that would not be a wise decision, for I am sort of eager to see what this artist would paint next. Plus I had other things to buy at this flea market and I needed to save my bullets. You see I carry this shot gun in a large shopping bag, in the event that I REALLY needed to haggle..

As the artist packet the painting in brown paper, I couldn’t help but say to him –
“Do you know that it is the 2 of us have in common?”
He paused what he was doing and looked up at me.

“We are both disharmonious members of society darling…” I said

Without saying a word, the artist handed me the newly packaged painting and as I looked closer I noticed he had a slight smile on his face.
This artist knew exactly what I meant.
The painting of the rotted corpse now hangs in my living room. What strikes me the most about this painting is its bright orange background, for it matches exactly with the orange carpet of my living room on which this dead body lies on

And you know my darling diary, it is not often one finds a painting that matches ones carpet.

Anastasia


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Anastasia Evolves

"I am Reptile, Hear Me Spit!"

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Dear Diary,
Something very sinister has happened to me, I cannot be certain as to how long this has been going on. But let me start from the beginning.
It all began when I was taking a stroll on a very cold windy afternoon. I began to feel a strange sensation in my feet. I was having difficulty walking but wasn’t sure why. I brushed the matter off for I was in no mood to dwell on such a pesky discomfort.

As I walked by a group of humans, I noticed that they all stared at me. Not in a friendly manner like how neighbors who borrow cups of sugar from each other would. But these penetrating gazes were different so I stopped and looked back at them. Oh dear diary, I don’t know how to describe what I saw but it was highly unpleasant. These humans had shock and disgust written on their faces. Could it be that it was me who they were disgusted at?

The leader of this gang of humans screamed –

“Get Get out, get out you freak!”

The other humans started to applaud. They felt happy that their leader had spoken. I on the other hand was rather surprised. How did they know that I was not one of them?

I possessed all the features that a normal human would. But yet they were able to sniff me out just as easily as I knew that they were not one of my kind!

As the applause grew louder, my feet started to hurt oh so badly and I tripped. The leader of the gang was now very excited and exclaimed gleefully –

“The Freak has tripped”


I looked down at my feet only to be twice as shocked as I was before. Oh dear diary, I do not know how to tell you this. But I no longer had regular toes attached to my feet. Instead I had green scaly claw-like toes. It was these new green scaly toes that were giving me so much difficulty in walking in an upright position.

This gang of humans noticed all of this. However their faces displayed a series of expressions of which I found to be rather peculiar. The expressions were as follows:
Shock – anger – fright – anger – hatred – fright – shock

Despite the fact they obviously outnumbered me, these humans were afraid of me! I realized it was my unconventionality that frightened them; my dare to go against their routine shocked them, and my defiance against their society that angered them.

After all, how did I manage to live in this human society for so long without ever succumbing to them? But alas they were very aware of my existence. They knew it was important to put an end to me for my existence was a threat to them.

As they surrounded me, I began to feel sharp pains in my back that brought me crashing to the floor.
The leader of the gang happily exclaimed –

“ The Freak has fallen!”


As I lay on the floor, I realized that I was no longer human. I had mutated into a strange reptile-like creature. I was quite shocked by the transformation. I knew I was different but never realized that the difference would start to show physically. It was not very obvious that I was not one of them. Whatever creature it is that I mutated into, is in fact the next form of higher life.
And the only way that I can preserve myself is to get rid of these humans that want to make me extinct.

The leader of the gang rushed forward to stomp me with his heavy boots.

Getting rid of a creature that humans cannot understand seems to be somewhat of normality in this society.

I started to scream but no words came out. Instead a blue venom-like liquid shot from my mouth and landed on the leader who fell immediately to the floor lifeless.
Hahahhahaha… This mutation that I am undergoing obviously has some fantastic benefits.

Using my new mutation, I sent shots of blue venom to the remaining humans who came tumbling to their feet. As I stared at the lifeless humans my body changed back into a human shape and I was once again able to walk properly. I had the uncanny ability to switch back and forth.

I shall continue my existence in this human society. Though I do hope that I will be able to pass on this new mutation.
After all in order for individuals to be accepted, society must evolve.

Anastasia


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